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Galen Brandt's ode to "No Ordinary Eric"
on his 40th Birthday (read at Manning Park, July 23rd, 2004)


Eric's Book

NO ORDINARY ERIC
(with love and apologies from all of us on your 40th birthday)

We’re here in state to celebrate –

O happiest of groups! –

A boy not shy, born in July,

From a town they call Kamloops

 

Who’s made it clear each passing year

This tot is not generic –

Yes, history’s made sure that he’s

No ordinary Eric!

 

He, eating sand, could understand

The trials of Bilbo Baggins,

And great his fame in every game

Of Dungeons and of Dragons.

 

A boy who as a Venturer Scout

Would always keep his promish --

And still, when going walkabout,

Sprints handily up Squamish.

 

As thespian, no Idiot –

His talents knew no border.

Played Pan and Point with willing wit,

While practicing recorder.

 

And certainly this Cyrano

Seduced each schoolgirl wench

By playing on the piano

And a horn that’s oh so French.

 

Scoring with a soccer ball

More times than you could count it!

Who never knew a rock so tall

Or icy he’d not mount it!

 

As Nigel Penster with his friends

He’d fan in fits hysteric.

Such comedies make plain that he’s

No ordinary Eric.

 

So manly on his motorbike –

And would he ever speed? No!

He’d fence! Canoe! Go camping! Hike!

While mastering akido!

 

Renowned in town for up and down

And e’en cross-country skiing --

He’s no one’s fool, this Intellectool,

Extraordinary being!

 

And high and low did Eric go

When traveling – just ask us.

Why, everywhere from Trafalgar Square

To Canjam’s Kananaskis.

 

And making sense in every tense

Of consonants and vowels,

He’s quite at ease while sipping teas

With various Baden Powells.

 

And smelting parts while melting hearts

Amidst a blaze of sparks,

Add to the list a naturalist

Explaining slugs in parks!

 

Revered for soups from Van to Loops,

This oh so friendly smithy

Did jump through school and social hoops

With words both apt and pithy.

 

Tackling subjects most arcane

And frankly unendearing,

He manages to entertain

With tales of engineering.

Abandoning mundanity,

He suddenly surprises

And fixates on humanity

That’s winning Nobel Prizes.

 

And even when he turns his pen

To higher education,

He’s sure to please his fans for he’s

Eschewing obfuscation.

 

Avowed vegetarian –

Articulate, artistic –

A faddish epicurean –

A tad anachronistic –

 

When lovely Laurie learned his story,

All at once she knew she

Could not dismiss his smile, his kiss,

His dal, his fudge, his sushi…

 

And just this week, he of whom we speak

(Now living in a tent), he

Awoke indeed to find that he’d

Turned twenty years plus twenty!

 

So we unload

This well-earned ode

And hope you’re not choleric –

For history’s

Made clear that he’s

No ordinary Eric!

No mysteries –

Just lists like these!

Advanced degrees

In specialties!

His history’s

All victories!

Sincerely he’s --

Most clearly he’s --

No ordinary Eric!

 


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